Idiot.

So, um, I'm kinda terrified of rain and have this fear it's always gonna flood.
Why is it almost 2 a.m. And I'm watching real life footage of the bug tsunami from years ago. It's on tv. It is horrifying. My worst nightmare and its not even like I'm watching some movie, it's real. These are survivors videos. Ugh, I can't even imagine. I'll never ever move near an ocean. Ever.

I'm afraid to sleep cause I don't want to dream about this.

Saturday

12:00 p.m: 2 rice cakes with cashew butter.

6:00 p.m: Broccoli and hummus

I'm home being lazy. So lazy I don't even want to cook.

8:30 p.m: Tomato, spinach, kale, bok choy, cauliflower, spices, coconut oil, quinoa. All in a pan.

9:15 p.m: Blended coconut milk, protein powder, apple, cocoa powder. Not bad.

Friday

Today should be a Wednesday, but it's Friday. Yessssss.

I set my alarm to work out this morning. Didn't happen. I also didn't last night. I suck. This weekend and tonight, hardcore.

9:00 a.m: Baby carrots

12:00 p.m: Leftover from yesterday's dinner

The sugar cravings are coming. It's been three days. Here we go.

3:00 p.m: Apple. There's my sugar.

6:00 p.m: 1 rice cake with cashew butter

Exercise (7:30 p.m): 30 mins on treadmill. Stepped it up a bit and ran faster.

8:30 p.m: 2 hard boiled eggs. Kale, spinach, broccoli, onion fried in coconut oil.

9:30 p.m: Stove top popcorn

Thursday

If only all work weeks were 3 days. Almost over.

9:30 a.m: Baby carrots

12:30 p.m: Leftover from last night, except the brussels sprouts.

3:45 p.m: 2 rice cakes with cashew butter

7:30 p.m: I know what you're thinking, this meal could use some meat. Meh. I'll have a protein drink later and make it up. Anyways, this is just sweet potato baked in the oven with olive oil/spices. The other is cauliflower, bok choy, spinach and onion pan fried in coconut oil.

Wednesday

Exercise (6:00 a.m): 30 mins on treadmill, 20 running. Hey, it's something!

7:30 a.m: 2 hard boiled eggs

12:00 p.m: Tabouli and sarma. Foreign food.

4:00 p.m: Had some baby carrots.

8:00 p.m: I really enjoyed dinner. Plain quinoa (just for the protein really), put mushroom, red pepper, kale, spinach and onion in a pan with coconut oil. Roasted brussels sprouts in the oven with olive oil, S&P and some roasted garlic blend spice. Let me tell you, I am now obsessed with roasting brussells sprouts. So good!! Made enough for lunch tomorrow. Woohoo! On the right track so far...

It's a new year.

I don't want to be all cliche and say all these new year things I plan on doing. I'm just gonna bitch cause I feel moody these days.

I feel moody and all teenage angsty. I can tell you exactly why. I am off my healthy eating track and it ruins everything. I'm irritable for no reason and I honestly hate looking in the mirror. I need my strong body back!! It's insane how much a 5 pound gain can change everything. I'm really looking forward to boot camp starting again.... 4 days a week, starts Monday! Work is also very busy and stressful right now and I'm actually a bit nervous about that too. Lots to do and I'm the only one responsible for it. Someone from work is going to one day read this and realise that I'm a duck. Yes, a duck. Calm and cool above the water, paddling like crazy underneath. I'll survive... I hope. I just don't like to disappoint people and I feel like I always do. See, teenage angst and emo. Give me a damn carrot!

What else can I bitch about?

Oh. Want to know a secret? I absolutely cannot stand the sound of chewing... been that way since like I was 10. Best part... my family has no concept of eating with your mouth closed or not talking with your mouth full. The past two days have been torture. Every moment I am at the table or near them eating I am literally being tortured. It's THAT bad. If you ever wanted to torture me, tie my hands up (so I can't plug my ears) and chew loudly. I will likely blow up. Just thinking about is making my blood boil. Ahhhhhhhhh! You're wondering how I grew up? I stopped eating at the table in my teen years. I'd take my food to my room. I can't imagine how bitchy I'd be if I still lived at home. My parents would hate me. Those commercials where dogs are chewing on their food? I change the channel. Ugh. Something is wrong with me.

I'd also like to bitch about something else.... and this is going out to my friends. Only one reads this, I think, and he doesn't count.

Stop making fun of me for being a vegetarian. I know you don't mean harm and it's all fun and jokes. But, I don't just eat carrots and grass. I eat REAL food... balanced meals. I'm not perfect but I try. Do I make fun of you for your high fat, carb filled, deep fried diets? No. I may not eat meat but my broccoli will always beat McDonalds!

Tuesday

Back to healthy.

10:30 a.m: 2 hard boiled eggs, boiled sweet potato, kale and spinach pan fried in coconut oil. So good.

 

2:30 p.m: At cousins place where we had leftovers from last night's dinner. The meal was actually healthy, it was dessert that failed. I said I wouldn't have any, only if it was worth it. I actually kept my word. See below for what I was up against. I wanted to try them ALL. I decided to really look and only eat what was something amazing. A lot of those are good but not something you eat and are like holy crap. Except one. That cake in the middle. As soon as I saw my cousin take it out of the box I knew it was special. She always goes and gets pastries fresh from some pricy bakery. Never fails. This was some almond cake. It tasted like an almond croissant in cake form. I died.. and so did my whole family. It was well worth it. Anyways, no more.

Exercise (7:30 p.m): I did a 30 min body weight exercise program using the Nike exercise app. I was good and sweaty. Planning to run in the morning.

8:15 p.m: Protein powder and water

9:30 p.m: Stove top popcorn